Letter to Heaven

It's been a long time since I wrote a letter to heaven so I did 2 matching pages with letters to heaven last night for my angel baby girls.  The summer is the best time of year for us, as far as our grief goes.  We have the girls' birthdays and angel days (the days they died) throughout the year in Sept. Nov. Feb. and Apr.  So every few months, we are hit hard with our grief.  The summer goes a little bit smoother.  I can feel inside of me that September and that Chloee's Birthday is coming so I thought I'd do some griefwork and write to my girls - really wish I knew how to mail this to heaven.....

Using Color of Love by Kristi W Designs

 he holds the key to my heart - in heaven.  When she died, we bought a special mother and daughter set of bracelets that had a key and a lock on them.  She is buried with hers on and I wore mine for a long time - until it broke at Disneyland.  It spilled all over and I remember these super nice people helping us pick up beads from the ground.  It hurt my heart when it broke and I kept the pieces that we were able to find - but I haven't yet.  I just try to remember that my heart holds the real key to her heart...  Miss you Bree!  Love you.

I used Kellybell's kit The French Quarter

Our Tinkerbell Fairy

My friend Natalie of Natalie's Place Designs, has a new Tinkerbell kit out with purpliciousness!!!
And of course I had to do pages for my BumBum, Bree-Elle, our Tinkerbell Fairy!  These fairy pics were taken 2 weeks before she died.  I still can't believe she's gone... 3 years later.
But I am lovin' this kit and it makes me so happy to make this purplicious page for her!

Find Natalie's Indigo Kit on her blog - Natalie's Little Corner of the World

Guesting Pages for Graham Like the Cracker

I spent some time last month guesting for the digital scrap designer Jennifer Graham aka Graham Like the Cracker and I wanted to share the pages I made for Bree using her cute kits!

I've been trying to do a page for when we wrote the girls' names in the sand for sooooo long now.  Nothing seemed to look right.  So when I got to use her new kit Drift Away, I was inspired to try yet again.  Here's the page I came up with that I actually love now:

And likewise for Bree with the kit Purple is my Signature Color because it was!!!  Everything purple reminds us of Bree.  Here's her page with a very precious photo.  My heart is tied to her with heartstrings.

You can find Graham Like the Cracker on her blog here

A Purple Heaven

Kellybell Designs has her newest kit out!  It's a Frog Prince kit called On the River made for the movie The Princess and The Frog with Princess Tiana and Prince Naveen.  I wasn't sure what to do with it but then after seeing the cute stuff in the kit and all of the purpleness... I had to do a page for my Bree-Elle.  It's called A Purple Heaven :)  Love you, BreeBree

Find Kellybell's kit On the River here
And of course, she has freebies on her blog here

My Favorite Bree Outfit

A page dear to my heart for my Angel daughter Bree about one of my favorite outfits that she wore... still sitting in her closet...
Her purple bow with plenty of bling, her purple sneakers, and a shirt that says "Daddy's Girl"

I used Mango Tango mini kit by Delicious Scraps

Daddy, when I get to heaven can I taste the Milky Way?

Do you know the Buddy Jewell song Help Pour Out the Rain?  The line is "Daddy, when we get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?".  It's on our list of songs for the girls and I've been wanting to do a page for it for a long time.  Then Kristi came out with the PERFECT kit for it, so I made this page.  I really do love it and it makes me wonder what they are doing in heaven :)

Made using Kristi W Designs new kit Sweet Lil' Angel

The full lyrics:
The moment was custom-made to order:
I was ridin' with my daughter on our way back from Monroe.
An' like children do, she started playin' twenty questions,
But I never would've guessed one would touch me to my soul.

She said: "Daddy, when we get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?
"Are we goin' there to visit, or are we goin' there to stay?
"Am I gonna see my Grandpa? Can I have a pair of wings?
"An' do you think that God could use another Angel,
"To help pour out the rain?"

Well, I won't lie: I pulled that car right over,
An' I sat there on the shoulder tryin' to dry my misty eyes.
An' I whispered: "Lord, I wanna thank you for my children.
"'Cause your innocence that fills them often takes me by surprise."

Like: "Daddy, when we get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?
"Are we goin' there to visit, or are we goin' there to stay?
"Am I gonna see my Grandpa? Can I have a pair of wings?
"An' do you think that God could use another Angel,
"To help pour out the rain?"

Well, I thought about it later on,
An' a smile came to my face.
An' when I tucked her in to bed,
I got down on my knees an' prayed.

Lord, when I get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?
"I don't wanna come to visit 'cause I'm comin' home to stay.
"An' I can't wait to see my family and meet Jesus face to face.
"An' do you think, Lord, you could use another Angel,
"To help pour out the rain?"

Mmmm, can I help pour out the rain?

You Make Me Smile!

A page for my new fav song by Uncle Cracker called Smile.


Credits: Digidesignresort collab called Everlasting Happiness Kit A and B

Lyrics of Smile:
You're better then the best
I'm lucky just to linger in your light
Cooler than the flip side of my pillow, that's right
Completely unaware
Nothing can compare to where you send me,
Lets me know that it's ok, yeah it's ok
And the moments where my good times start to fade

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

Even when you're gone
Somehow you come along
Just like a flower poking the sidewalk crack and just like that
You steal away the rain and just like that

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

Don't know how I lived without you
Cuz everytime that I get around you
I see the best of me inside your eyes
You make me smile
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

In Loving Memory Scrapbook Page

I've been wanting to do a scrapbook page with the lyrics to the song Living for the Night by George Strait.  I love the line out of the song "Everyday's a Lifetime Without You" because it is so true when you lose a child.  Everyday I feel like I'm losing out on a lifetime with them...
So I did the top page first for Bree.  I love the big clock.  It seems that the biggest thing we miss is time with them.


I used Fanfan's new kit White is...

Here are the George Strait Living for the Night song lyrics:

Everyday's a lifetime without you
Hard to get through, since you've gone
So I do the only thing I know how to,
to get by
I'm living for the night

I've drawn all the curtains in this old house
To keep the sun out, off of my face
Friends stop by to check-in 'cause I've checked out
I tell them I'm fine,
I'm just living for the night

Daylight can't hide the tears I cry
the pain that came with your goodbye
The memories that keep me out of sight
Every night I venture out
into those neon arms that hold me tight
I'm living for the night

I'm a whole lot easier to talk to,
when I've had a few and settled down
Whiskey kills the man you've turned me into
And I come alive
I'm living for the night

Daylight can't hide the tears I cry
the pain that came with your goodbye
The memories that keep me out of sight
Every night I venture out
into those neon arms that hold me tight
I'm living for the night
I'm living for the night

Everyday is a lifetime without you

Diaper Cake Pages

I've been wanting to scrapbook some of the harder things that we (as grieving parents) go through - and it's painful but I'm really happy with how these pages turned out and document just one difficult thing we've done.

Journaling reads:
The Diaper cake for Nurse Carrie

One of the hard things
that a grieving parent has
to do is to decide what to
do with their child's things.
There were many things and many
different decisions we  made about their things.
One thing I kept was Chloee's diapers.  I
expected to use them with our next child but
when Bree was alive she never grew big enough
to use Chloee's diapers. So when Bree died, we
had twice as many diapers that I didn't know
what to do with and that made me soooo sad
that they sat there instead of being used by
my babies. I finally decided to give them to
the very special people in my life that had been
there for us and that had struggled through
life also. One of those people was Nurse Carrie.
She is one of only a few nurses who cared for
and loved both of my girls. Carrie struggled with
cancer and infertility and we could relate to
each other's problems and the crappiness of
life. In 2008, she finally had a baby girl and I
wanted to give her some of their diapers.  I made a
cute little diaper cake to give to her. It felt
good to give them to her to use. She was such a
good friend to me and loved my girls so
much!  We love you Nurse Carrie!

Carrie is currently undergoing cancer treatments
and transplants.  Carrie - just want you to know
we love you and are thinking of you!!

I used Delicious Scraps new kit Chocolate Mint Mini

I heart you!

Bree's page is called My Heart - I love the background on that page!


All pages made using: Fanfan Rue des Anges' kit Everything About You

Princess Page!

Each week, they have Disney digital scrapbooking challenges over at MouseScrappers.com, a Disney fan and scrapbooking site.  They are super fun and have great prize packages for those that complete a challenge.  Check it out here

This week, the challenge was to create a Disney scrapbooking page with pastel colors.  Of course, I thought of doing a princess page with a princess fairy kit I was working on for JKCreations and even though I don't have any pics of my girls with any of the princesses - I decided to do a few Disney Princess inspired pages for them anyway!

The Tinkerbell page is for my Bree-Elle.  I found the perfect quote for it... "And in the end, Peter Pan stole Tinkerbell's wings so she would never leave."  How we wish we could have stolen her wings and kept her here with us forever...  Miss you Bree

Credits: Skyla by JKCreations

Pages for Bree-Elle

Some pages for Bree
I think her favorite color is blue so I loved these angel wings... and wanted to add them to one of her pics.
I also loved that super cute angel bear.  Then I found that quote - it's perfect since her angel sister was watching over her the short time she was here...

Credit: Angelic by Aquarius at DigiDesignResort

Easter Scrapbook Pages

I LOVE this Easter themed page!

This our Bree-Elle when she was first "hatched".  I used Happy Easter collab from DigiDesignResort

In Loving Memory, Remembrance Scrapbook Pages

These pages were made with a very special kit by a designer I create pages for - Just Jaimee.
She made this digital scrapbooking kit in honor of me and my angel daughters.  It is called Just for Denise Never Forgotten by Just Jaimee
I feel so honored and thankful for this kit created especially for us and I am so thankful to have the perfect kit to scrapbook these memorial pages.  Scrapping my girls helps me keep them alive.  Thank you soooo much Jaimee!
The last page has the lyrics from the Josh Groban song To Where You Are - one of the songs that we played at Bree's funeral.

Beautiful Angel for us to Love

For our Bree-Elle, our beautiful angel send down to us to Love - and we will never stop loving her...
Love how all you see is her beautiful blue eyes in this page.

Credits: Haynay Designs freebie mini kit "Good Times all Around"

More Pages for my Bree-Elle

I've been working on some pages for Diana's Creations new kit called The Smell of Flowers

The first page is called Bree Grows in Heaven :)  So cute and fun! in her little flower pot in heaven.  That's my favorite picture of her - it's the one on her headstone except it's in purple.
The second page use the lyrics in a song that I love called Bubbly by Colbie Caillat.
Bree's page says "You make me smile, please stay for awhile."  I remember thinking that every day she was here just wanting her to stay... Until she got sooo sick and the seizures were so bad that we let her go.

Bree's Floral Heaven

I worked on some pages for my girls from a kit called Ambiance Reloaded by Fanfan Rue des Anges.
This one is called Bree's Floral Heaven.  That pic of her is when she was just born.  You can just see how she fits in her daddy's hand - sooo tiny and beautiful.
Oh, I miss her...

Happy Birthday in Heaven to Bree-Elle

Happy Birthday Baby Bree!  I can't believe you'd be 3 years old.  I wonder what you'd be like.  I wonder if you'll come be with us today...

Today, we will remember you, eat cake, sing to you, and let purple balloons go -  to you in heaven.  We are trying to get a children's museum membership worked out to give to the hospital in your memory.  It makes me happy to think that because of you families at the hospital will be able to go have some fun together time at the museum.

Every day's a lifetime without you sweetheart.  Happy Birthday BumbleBree.  We love you... we miss you... we just want to be with you

credits: let's celebrate by kasia designs

Disney Princess Page for Bree

I never will know what princess would be her favorite.....
Bree as Jasmine  -  soaring,tumbling, freewheeling through an endless diamond sky in heaven